If you feel stuck in an endless cycle, know that you're not alone.

We all run different races, but I've observed the following pattern with my post-exit, post-ecomonic brethren.

Phase I - euphoria, relaxation and relief. The day the wire transfer hit is one I'll never forget. The great weight is lifted, financial future secure, you can finally sleep at night. This phase lasts between an hour and a week.

Phase II - buying a bunch of shit, making dumb investments. For me this was a plane and another house. I'm writing this from the house (it's great!) but the plane is long gone. Perhaps another post on that later. Another common theme is making a bunch of angel investments and private investments. This is almost always a mistake, at least according to my experience and research. You end up with losses, problems to solve and a complicated tax return. Some may want to do this as a way of giving back, but it's generally not advised to allocate a high % of your portfolio to anything that's not a liquid index fund that quietly earns a return and never calls you.

Phase III - wait... why am I not happy? This hit me a few years into retirement. I was busy buying and renovating houses, amusing myself with luxury travel, golf and all the other things people do. When I finished all the house projects (I'm great at preparing to be happy) it hit me... I'm not happy, or at least as happy as I thought I'd be. As I like to say: "My life is a 10 out of 10, but I thought it would be at least a 12."

Here are the things I didn't count on:

1) I missed the structure, purpose and identity I had as a founder/CEO. All the things I was tired of (the Monday finance meeting, the quarterly board meeting, the Accounts Receivable Thursday roundup) were really the scaffolding holding my life up. Who knew? While working, your purpose is clear. People count on you. You're useful. You're pursuing important goals with people you like and trust and respect. And identity... what do you say now when people ask what you do? It's a small thing to be guarded in your answer to a stranger, but a great big thing when you don't know yourself who you are.

2) All play and no work makes Jeff a dull boy. I thought I'd easily transition into a life of leisure and luxury, jetting around with others in the winners' circle of life. But it didn't happen. Living on vacation is very different than going on vacation.

3) The things "they" told me to do didn't fill me up. These included mentoring, angel investing and philanthropy. All of these can be good, but they didn't fill me up in a way that I expected.

Phase IV - a renewing cycle or new pursuits, frameworks, quests. It's been my observation that BTFL people move up and down, back and forth on the grid of their behavior and how they perceive it. Some days are fresh and new and full of energy. Some days are dark and confusing.

During this never-ending phase you might:

• decide to go back to work
• learn to play a musical instrument
• invest (regrettably) in a bunch of startups
• get in shape, run a marathon
• rescue dogs
• experiment with psychodelics
• buy another house or three
• consider moving to New Zealand (or equivalent place you're not in now)
• vibe code an army of agents that are just as confused as you
• explore longevity - how's that cold plunge treating you?
• consider buying a business - maybe you could roll up some HVAC companies?

If this sounds a bit like you... It's ok - you are not alone.